Tuesday, November 24, 2009


I was talking with a friend today who was struggling with partiality in her family. A parent had been partial to a brother and now--even though they're adults--there are still consequences to that partiality. The pain, anger, and hatred has only grown.

Have you ever seen partiality in action? It's not beneficial for anyone. The favored child has expectations the rest of their lives (unless they recognize it and overcome it). The less favored child never feels as if they measure up (unless God transforms them by renewing their minds). The favored child usually lords it over their sibling who is less favored. One feels significant while the other feels unloved. I've never seen anything good come out of partiality. You know....it's o.k. to appreciate the different strengths each child might have...as long as you're appreciating strengths in each child. It's only natural that your personality may mesh well with one particular child's personality. But that only means you need to put forth more effort with the other kids.

The Bible has several examples about one child who is favored over another. Ishmael & Isaac. Jacob & Esau. Joseph and his 11 brothers. It's hard to have a happy ending where one child is shown more favor.

I challenge each of us to examine our hearts and make sure we're not being partial to one child--or grandchild--over another. Ask God to search your heart with Truth. And have the same attitude towards your children that God has towards us.

"For God shows no partiality [undue favor or unfairness; with Him one man is not different from another]." Romans 2:11


Marcy Faye Hallden said...

Funny, Pam has always told me that God does show favoritism--and how life isn't fair. I think I agree with your perspective.

Gary said...

Weren't our parents great role models for how to be impartial? We were blessed! Can't wait to see you guys on Friday! Love ya, sis.

Duncans in Doha said...

Well said, 2 thumbs up! You really could write a book Becky.