5784

I always search for the Hebrew year and its meaning when our New Year rolls around. The Hebrew year actually begins at Rosh Hashanah which was in September. There is a Hebrew meaning to the numbers in the year. I remember 2020 was the Year of Tottering—and boy!  Didn’t we totter??

This year is the Hebrew year 5784 which is the Year of Open Doors. This excites me! Don’t we all hope for open doors? Doors which God opens and no man can close. The ultimate open door will be the rapture—when God’s people go to heaven together. 

I also ask God for a word for the new year. This year, I felt like God was telling me “MIRACLES.”  As I began sharing miracles I’ve seen during my life on Facebook, I asked God not to stop! I don’t want all of the miracles to be in my past—I want to see them every day! So it’s so cool that He gave me that word.  

Open Doors and Miracles. I think 2024 will shape up to be a very good year! God, give me eyes to see and ears to hear! 

God Waits…

Whenever I see a verse about “waiting,” it jumps off the page at me now! Isaiah 30:18 says, “Therefore the Lord will wait, that He may be gracious to you; and therefore He will be exalted that He may have mercy on you. For the Lord is a God of justice; blessed are all those who wait for Him.”

Does God wait to see if we’ll wait on Him? Staying with the story of Moses (and after bouncing this

off my prayer partners), you’ll remember that when God called him to come up the mountain to receive the Ten Commandments, Moses waited six days—and then God spoke on the seventh day. Moses waited…and God was gracious to him. God is exalted when we wait on Him. 

Meanwhile, back at camp, Aaron had been told to lead the people. They waited…and then they didn’t.  When Moses didn’t come back in a timely manner, they constructed a golden calf to be their god.  Because they didn’t wait…and because they disobeyed (so quickly!), God punished them.  

Does God wait to see if we’ll wait on Him?  Is that what the waiting is for—to test our obedience and commitment? 

He wants to have mercy on you. Wait. You’ll be blessed!

Waiting Time

Moses had taken 70 elders up Mount Sinai where they saw God—and ate and drank with Him. What an amazing experience! Then God told Moses to come up higher and He would give him tablets of stone containing the law and commandments which he was to teach the people. 

Moses climbed the mountain and was enveloped in a cloud. The glory of the Lord rested on Mount Sinai for six days. On the seventh day, God spoke. 

My daughter-in-law, Shanna, made this point with me this week. God sent Moses. But why did he have to wait seven days until God spoke? What was God doing? Do you think Moses questioned God? He was human after all—just like us.  I’m sure he called out to God, “I’m here! Do I need to find some stones for you?”

God made him wait. Why, do you think? Has God ever sent you somewhere and then made you wait? Why does He do that? I have some theories. Maybe He’s quieting our hearts. Maybe the distance that’s created makes us want to pull in closer to hear His voice. Maybe He’s giving us time to examine our hearts. Maybe He wants us to rest, trust, and hope in the waiting. Maybe all of that and more. 

God still makes His people wait. He may call you to a place and a task and then make you wait. It feels unsettling. It may make you question the call.  But wait anyway. Press in close to the heart of God. He just may be preparing you for what’s ahead. 

The Steadman’s Rebuilding Pt. 5

Caleb and I had marked a date on the calendar for our projected move-in date. It was two weeks away and I was worried. “Caleb, how are we going to furnish the house?” I asked. We’d spent every penny on construction. In fact, we’d had to take out a loan to finish up the house—the insurance check just didn’t go far enough to cover a new water well and septic system. “Merry, God knows what we need. We’ve asked and we’ll keep on asking. You know He’s never failed us!” I replied, “I know. It’s just…I don’t want my kids having to sleep on the floor!” Caleb laughed and said, “You and I have both slept on the floor many times as a kid. It won’t kill them.”  I knew that. But we had nothing. No furniture. No household goods. Not even a blanket. Everything we were using was on loan. 

We were spending this week painting. I was good at rolling and Caleb was the best at cutting in. At least our contractor had come with a paint sprayer one night and painted all of the ceilings—and saved us that work. “It’s my final gift to you,” he said as he handed us the house key.  Honestly, the house looked better than I’d ever expected! We’d added a front porch and back patio that we hadn’t had before. We’d painted the outside of the house white with black trim with big cedar posts holding up the porch overhang. There were also cedar shutters. It looked very much like an updated farmhouse.  We’d also made the kitchen and living room more open. The kitchen had a huge bar where the kids could do homework and the living room had a big, beautiful fireplace. We’d tried to keep it just like the original one which was made with Chicago brick and had a barn beam for a mantle. Henry was getting his own room. The twins would share a room as would the girls. The kids got to pick the color of their rooms—with a little guidance from me, of course. I was excited about our bedroom—it was larger than the original and we’d added a big walk-in closet. Our bathroom got an enormous shower and a free-standing tub. I couldn’t wait to take advantage of that tub!

It was Monday night and the painting was finished—which meant the house was finished. At our last dinner in the FEMA trailer, Caleb asked each of us to share what we’d learned since the tornado. We went around the table and each person had to answer. Henry went first. “I found out how much work it is to build a house,” he said. Sadie giggled and put her hand over her eyes. “Ummm…I learned how to do a flip on the trampoline!” David was next. “I learned how to hit a nail with a hammer.” He’d become quite the expert with that hammer. Matthew, not to be outdone, said loudly. “I learned not to put my arm in a pipe!” (Thank goodness! But…time would tell.) Ellie, following her big sister’s lead reported, “I learned how to climb the ladder.” And then it was my turn, “I learned what a hard worker Daddy is. I also saw his patience and encouragement almost every day. I watched my kids learn new things and help with every project in some way.  I learned that we have very generous friends and a big, good God who loves to provide for ALL of our needs.” Caleb started to talk, but choked up—which meant he had the attention of each of his kids. When he could finally talk, he said, “I learned what an amazing family I have. Everyone did all they could to help with the house. But more than that, I saw Henry grow in patience with his siblings. I saw Matthew learn to obey. I saw David eagerly learn new skills. I saw Sadie learn how to wait her turn. I saw Ellie learn how to entertain herself. I saw Mommy find a new level of trust. We all learned that God is good in bad times just like He is in good times. We are a blessed family!!”

Last week at church, Gwenneth, a widow who has wind turbines on her farm and is known for her generosity, found us and gave us a very sizable check. She wanted to pay off the loan for our septic system and water well—and to buy all of the furniture and household goods we would need. She told us that she and her husband, John, had been through a tornado and lost everything and they’d had no help. She wanted us to have a fresh start without struggling. We were blown away—what a huge blessing! A furniture truck was arriving tomorrow. 

Steadman Farms was rebuilt. But even better…so were the Steadmans. And tomorrow?  Tomorrow was the beginning of a new adventure for the Steadman family!

“Mom?!” Sadie yelled, “Matthew jumped out of the tree to do a flip on the trampoline!”

THE END. 

The Steadman’s Rebuilding Pt. 4

Ugh!! Anything that could go wrong, had gone wrong with this rebuilding project! We’d had to dig a new water well and go 50 feet deeper than the one before. The septic system had to be replaced. Finally, our contractor told us that if we could do any of the work ourselves, it would help keep the costs down. Caleb borrowed a ditch digger and dug the trench for the pipes leading from the house to the septic system and replaced pipes himself. The electrician came and showed him how to run the wires through the walls and he did all of that work. We both did the mudding and taping after the sheetrock was hung. Caleb put in recessed lighting and hung ceiling fans. Then the electrician came and connected it all—praising Caleb for a job well done! While he did that, I grouted around windows and trim on the outside of the house. A friend came and showed us how to tile a shower, so we did the tile work in the other two bathrooms, entryway, and kitchen. We also planned on painting every room in the house. No doubt about it, we’d have a bunch of new skills after this house was finished. 

I was in the middle of hanging wallpaper in the master bedroom when Henry came running in and said, “Mom! You better come quick! Matthew’s arm is stuck in a drain pipe!” It was the uncovered pipe leading to the old septic tank—and Matthew had dropped a Hot Wheel down the pipe and was trying to retrieve it. We eventually got his arm out after dousing it with a bottle of Crisco vegetable oil! “Caleb, we’ve got to do something for these kids,” I told him, “They’re bored because we’re too preoccupied. They’re going to get hurt unless we give them something to do!” We’d involved them as much as possible, but it wasn’t enough. Caleb said, “You know, we told them we’d replace the trampoline the tornado destroyed. Let’s do it now.” That night, after we fell into bed, we ordered a trampoline online. It would arrive in two days. We decided to wait and surprise the kids. 

We were exhausted. Building a house (especially with continually skyrocketing prices!) was not for the faint of heart. Practically every night as I showered, I had a good cry. I was so tired, I literally hurt. Some nights, I was so tired I couldn’t sleep. My house was a mess and we hadn’t had clean clothes in a week. I could tell my ever-calm husband’s nerves were being stretched to the breaking point. Just tonight, I heard him telling David, “Son, I’m sorry for yelling at you today. I was wrong. Will you forgive me?” We needed this project to be over. Even though we were seeing progress, it was hard to get excited because so many projects still needed to be completed. 

I came home to our FEMA trailer house after hanging wallpaper, and saw two cars parked out front. That looked like Jason & Jennifer Wilson’s car. And George & Miss Shirley’s! I walked in the house and saw what they’d done, and sat down and bawled like a baby. They’d cleaned the house, the washer was going, they’d brought a meal, and were feeding the kids. George whispered, “Caleb told us you had something that needed to be put together. Lead the way! Jason & I brought our tools.” I took them to the barn and showed them the trampoline which had arrived that afternoon. Within an hour, our five kids and the Wilson’s two kids were taking turns doing flips. The safety net was worth the extra money for my peace of mind. Even Ellie was loving it! She squealed, “Look Mommy, I jump!” Thank goodness Henry could help her up and down the ladder which would free me up in the days to come. 

Before we fell asleep that night, Caleb pulled me close and began praying, “God, we’re so rich! Thank you for the friends You’ve given us. People have helped us, loaned us equipment, brought meals, babysat, slipped us money, and done hard labor to save us money. Please bless them all! We’re so tired. Please renew our strength and give us the stamina to push through to the finish line. And God? Let us be the kind of friend others need. Don’t let us get tunnel vision. Help us always to be looking for ways to help others. In Jesus’ name, amen.  

Right before falling asleep, I thought “There WILL be an end to this, right, God?” 

It felt like the tornado had happened years ago.  

The Steadman’s Rebuilding Pt. 3

Two months. We were two months past the tornado. The trucks were all gone. People were gone. Everyone had been such a huge help, but now we were left with the help of insurance, FEMA, builders, and our own hands. Of course, God had never left us. And thank goodness He knew the way past this mess!

We were so glad another town who’d walked through the same thing a year before, sent their point man to share what they’d learned through the process of rebuilding. That’s how Caleb knew to apply for a FEMA trailer house to set on our property so we’d have a place to live while we rebuilt. Honestly, that town’s pain was used to help us and we hoped to do the same for someone else down the road—not that we wished this on anyone!

Caleb woke up this morning excited! He was like a kid before Christmas. “Today’s the day we start framing our house! I’ve asked Jennifer to come take photos of our family in front of the new foundation,” he told me. We were both nervous about the money stretching. The insurance company had been quick to total our house and to send a check. But prices of EVERYTHING kept going up every single day.  We also needed a houseful of furniture! We had dreamed a little with what we wanted in this house but we’d kept the same basic floor plan because it worked so well. A lumber store in Amarillo was sending trucks with everything we needed. Our contractor was a friend and he was working hard to help us keep the costs down. 

“1…2…3…smile!” Jennifer was clicking away. We were all wearing the new clothes mom had sent us. “Merry, it’s time to get out of the donated clothing,” she chided. What she didn’t realize is that it was actually nicer than a lot of what had been in our closet. But it gave us a boost to have something new. We’d waded through more mud, dirt, trash, and piles of broken lumber than I ever hoped to again. It took dump trucks weeks to haul off trash—and they were working eight hours a day to do it. 

The kids all thought this was a grand adventure thanks to Caleb’s attitude. (I was the resident worrier!) He’d put the boys to work helping clear the property. They were pretty proud of their work gloves. The girls and I kept the trailer house clean, animals fed, and the meals cooked, although we’d eaten pizza more often than I cared to admit. But today was framing day! “Girls, do not cross this line today,” Caleb told the girls as he drug the heel of his boot in the dirt. “Boys, grab your hammers. You’re helping,” he told some wide-eyed, excited boys. 

Caleb told me, “Merry, go in the house and sit down and rest. I won’t let the boys do more than they can handle—I just want them to remember building this house with their own hands. The girls will be well-entertained for a bit just watching,” He knew I was exhausted…but he was also rubbing the frown lines between my brows. He knew I was worried. Too many things were going on.  Too many decisions had to be made. And there were way too many expenses. And some days it felt like there were too many kids in the trailer house. “They’re a gift!” I reminded myself.  

So I did…I went in the house and sat down. I needed some time to lay all of this at Jesus’ feet. I felt like I’d been living in a tornado myself with no time to turn things off and sit at Jesus’ feet. Caleb knew me well. I opened my Bible and it fell open to Psalm 37. My eyes fell on verses 3-7 underlined in my Bible: 

Trust in the Lord, and do good; 

Dwell in the land, and feed on His faithfulness.

Delight yourself also in the Lord, 

And He shall give you the desires of your heart. 

Commit your way to the Lord,

Trust also in Him, and He shall bring it to pass. 

He shall bring forth your righteousness as the light,

And your justice as the noonday. 

Rest in the Lord and wait patiently for Him,

Do not fret because of him who prospers in his way,

Because of the man who brings wicked schemes to pass. 

Yes, Caleb knew me well, but God knew me better.  “God, I confess my sin of worry. You are already in our future. You know what it’s going to take to rebuild. Would You rebuild me in the process? Rebuild us as a family. I commit my way to You. I WANT to delight in You! I want Your desires…and I want to trust that the desires that are in my heart are from You. Please help me rest in You. Change me. In Jesus’ name, amen.  

I sat awhile with God. He loved on me and filled me.  We even had a couple of laughs together. And then I was ready to face building a house and whatever it might bring. 

“Girls! Do you want to come in and make some cookies for our builders?” They jumped up from making mud pies and squealed, “YESSSS!!!” We hadn’t made cookies in a good, long while.  

It was time. Time to start rebuilding all that Satan had destroyed.  

The Steadman’s Rebuilding Pt. 2

The sky was full of sunshine this morning and there was a lingering smell of rain in the air. You’d never know a tornado had devastated Sunrise, Texas just twelve hours ago. Our house was uninhabitable as were 75% of the homes in our small community. Fortunately, we’d only heard of two non-life threatening injuries; one was a lady in the nursing home and the other was a 14-year-old delivery boy who was caught out in the storm. Two churches were unscathed—ours, First Baptist (where Caleb was part-time pastor), and First Methodist. Big coffee urns filled with Folgers were going full-blast this morning at both places to give pseudo-energy to dozens of adults who were now homeless.  We’d managed to cobble together cots, air mattresses, and old-fashioned pallets (quilts on the floor) for everyone last night. Ellie had cried for Miss Bunny at bedtime—her stuffed buddy. She was inconsolable until Miss Shirley brought a teddy bear from the church nursery. She’d told Ellie, “Ellie, baby…look who I found in the nursery! Mr. Teddy was crying and needs some love. Would you sleep with him tonight?” It did the trick. I only wished I could be comforted that easily. I also wished I could have gone to sleep as quickly as the kids did. Poor babies! So much had happened so quickly. I was exhausted from loss and from trying to console my family. 

There was already the sound of 18-wheelers and pickups with trailers rolling into town. Caleb had become the point man for our community. Even though so much was going on, I couldn’t help but take notice, “God, You are amazing! This is the same man who could hardly have a conversation with a stranger 13 years ago! And now…look at him!” He was on the phone and directing trucks all at the same time.  Help was on the way!

The Baptist men from the Texas panhandle had shown up with their food trailer and had fed us all breakfast. They promised they’d be there for every meal. It was such a comfort to know that this basic need would be provided—because I didn’t even know if I had any pans left. Caleb found me an hour later and told me, “Jennifer and Jason have offered to watch the younger kids. I want you and Henry to go with me to see what we can salvage at the house. I also need to go feed the animals.” Jason was our youth minister. And they had two kids of their own who were the ages of the twins and Sadie. We were together all the time, so I knew the kids would love getting to play together—and have a sense of normalcy. Thank goodness the parsonage they lived in was still intact.  

We took a minute just to stand and look at what was left of our house. Henry asked Caleb, “Dad, will this fall down if we try to get things out?” It did look a little precarious. Caleb told him, “Henry, you start digging outside first and see what you can find. I’ll try to stabilize things after I feed the animals. Merry, the living area is fine to dig in. Start there. Bring anything you find to this open place under the tree. And please be careful!”  It sure would be nice to find the kids’ immunization records to know if Henry had had a tetanus shot!

We were dirty, sweaty, and exhausted two hours later. I’d given in to my emotions as I worked—it was heart wrenching! And our pile of salvageable things was small. We heard a pickup kick up gravel and we all turned to watch it come down our road. Three men got out of the cab and reached in the back to get their chainsaws and one said, “Preacher, we’ve come to take care of things for you so you can get back and oversee things in town. There are a lot of questions people have and no one knows how to answer. Caleb shook their hands and thanked them and then turned to me and said, “Merry, let’s head back to town. Henry, grab a few of those things and toss them in the back of the pickup.”  I turned to give one last perusal to our devastated house and happened to see a pink ear lying under some boards. “Miss. Bunny! Henry, help me get Miss Bunny out from under these boards.” I pulled out a very muddy bunny rabbit with one ear barely attached. She would need surgery and a bath before she slept with Ellie tonight. 

We arrived to a town we didn’t recognize. Trucks and trailers were everywhere. Food trucks, a shower trailer, a trailer with washers and dryers, trucks bearing men with chainsaws, electricians to restore parts of the town’s power, cell phone company trucks, trailers with water, port-a-potties, women cooking over 5 gallon pots, a tent going up to house a truckload of clothing. Henry exclaimed, “Whoa! Where did all of this come from?”  Caleb replied, “From the heart of God, Henry. From the heart of God.”

A verse was rolling around in my head and I had to give voice to it before it left me. “I will answer them before they even call to me. While they are still talking about their needs, I will go ahead and answer their prayers!” I couldn’t have even thought to ask for all of this! As devastated as I was about losing so much, I had to stop and acknowledge what God was doing. “Thank You, God. You are good. No matter what we lost, You are good. Thank you for saving our family, our church, and our town. Thank You.”

The Steadman’s Rebuilding Pt. 1

“MERRY!!! Get the kids in the cellar! NOW!” Caleb was screaming at me. At first, my legs felt like they were in cement but my mind finally connected with my feet. A tornado was coming!  “Henry! Get your sisters and RUN to the cellar! I knew his 12-year-old body could get the heavy cellar door up. “David, go with Henry!  Where’s Matthew?!” I was frantically trying to find David’s 9-year-old twin brother. Where was that boy?  In all likelihood, he could be on the roof watching the tornado! That boy was too adventurous for his own good. 

“Matthew! MATTHEW!!! I felt like my voice was being sucked up into the winds. “Mom! Look at this!” Matthew was standing in the second floor bedroom by the window with his binoculars watching the approaching tornado. There was no time to talk. I grabbed his arm and spun him around and began half-carrying him down the stairs and out the back door towards the cellar. Henry was standing at the top of the steps holding the door open enough so he could see us coming. Just as I was about to step into the opening, Caleb grabbed Matthew and practically threw us into the cellar and locked the heavy door. My heart was about to pound out of my chest.  Our first tornado at Steadman Farms. 

The girls, Sadie-6, and Ellie-2, ran to me. Sadie sat next to me with her arms clung around my waist and Ellie was against my chest with her arms squeezing my neck. They were both sobbing. We could hear the roar of the winds as the door banged and sounded like it was going to be lifted off its hinges. The boys’ eyes were as round as saucers. David was sitting on his hands and shaking. In a very calm, yet loud voice, Caleb yelled, “Henry, thank you for getting everyone into the cellar! You did great.” He got up and moved over between Matthew and David and put an arm around each of them and pulled Henry near them. He began to pray loudly, “God, please protect us!! Protect our animals and neighbors, in Jesus’ mighty name, amen.” And just at that moment, we heard what sounded like a train coming. The tornado was here. We huddled together as far away from the cellar door as possible. Would it never end???

And then it was over and we heard rain and hail pounding on the tin-covered storm door. Caleb and I looked at one another. What had just happened? What would we find when we opened that door? We were still huddled together, waiting for the hail to subside. The little arms weren’t quite as tight around my waist and neck. I wanted to have a good cry—but knew I needed to remain calm for the kids’ sakes. When we no longer heard hail, Caleb walked up the steps to the door. He unlatched it and began lifting it. Matthew was right behind him and we all heard his, “WHOA!” We all walked out of the cellar and stood looking at what used to be our house. You could tell it had been a two-story house but it was seriously unrecognizable. I was in shock. The girls were crying and the boys were staring. Interestingly, the barn looked unscathed. I couldn’t speak. 

Caleb pulled us into a big huddle and began praying, “God, thank You for giving us this house. It’s been such a gift. Thank You for keeping us all safe. We don’t know what lies ahead of us, but we trust You. You have NEVER failed us. And we know You won’t now. Bless us. And bless every family in Sunrise who was affected by this tornado. In Jesus’ name, amen. 

I knew God was in control…but where were we going to sleep tonight? The kids and I were sitting in the pickup with the heater going full blast while Caleb checked on the animals. Ellie was still crying and we were all hungry. Caleb came out of the barn and came to my window. He’d already started calling our church members to check on them. He couldn’t help himself—he was the consummate pastor—always checking on his sheep. He told me, “Jason said the church was untouched. George and Miss Shirley have already met him there and they are setting up a shelter for those who need it. Let’s go, Merry.” 

I really wanted to go dig through the remains of our house and see what was salvageable…but my adrenaline had drained and I was as limp as a wet noodle. I knew I was really close to falling apart—I’m really no good in emergencies. I slipped out of the pickup and fell into Caleb’s arms. He held me close and whispered, “It’s going to be ok, Merry. I promise.”

The seven of us left Steadman Farms in Caleb’s old pickup. As Caleb made the turn, I looked out my window to the remains of our home for the past 13 years. A tear began making its way down my cheek. What lay ahead of the Steadman family?

“Jesus, Jesus, Jesus!”

It’s the only words my mind could form. 

The Shattering

I’ve been trying to make sense out of what’s been happening in my life. I’d be lying if I told you the past nine months (significant?) have been easy. I’d also be lying if I told you I hadn’t kicked and screamed a bit. 

You see…my life was beautiful. I’d been in the ministry for 48 years and a pastor’s wife for 43 years.  I knew what to expect.  Plop me down in any Baptist church and I could figure things out pretty quickly. My life was like the top mosaic—pieces of my life put together to hopefully reflect God’s great love for me and others.  

I came to understand what those pieces were this week. Why? Because there has been a great shattering in my life.  After retirement (or reassignment, as we like to call it—because we never intend to quit ministering), we were busy selling stuff, moving stuff, and visiting all four kids. But when the dust settled, I was left with this question, “Who am I!?” I was no longer a pastor’s wife. It’s like my carefully crafted mosaic fell apart and I was left with a pile of glass pieces—like the middle photo. None were broken…but it was no longer a beautiful mosaic. 

This week, I began to understand the shattering.  Those colorful pieces of glass are my desires. Psalm 20:4 says, “May He grant you according to your heart’s desires, and fulfill all your purpose.” God began putting those desires in my heart years ago. How?  “Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart.” Psalm 37:4. I’d never trusted the desires in my heart. But God says they lead to fulfilling my purpose. My desires are legitimate and beautiful because they’re from God!

As I stood looking at what the shattering in my life had caused—a pile of colorful glass—I realized this shattering had been necessary. I was no longer a pastor’s wife. I’ve entered a new season. My desires haven’t changed! (None of those glass pieces were broken.) I still want to have alone time, invest in others, write, create, travel, teach, encourage and all of those wonderful desires God has placed in my heart. But…it’s going to look different. 

I’m not sure what the new mosaic of Becky will look like. But God will pick up the pieces and solder them together with His very strong-holding solder. The amazing thing is He lets me participate in this remaking after the great breaking. As I submit and explore how to use those desires in a new way, a beautiful mosaic develops. I hope it’s a mosaic of beauty, freedom, and life.   

My greatest desire is that His light reflects through each desire He has placed in my heart. May His purpose be fulfilled.  

I’m ready, God!

Shattering

I’m trying to process what God is showing me about my life right now. I’d be lying if I told you the past nine months have been easy. I’d also be lying if I told you I haven’t kicked and screamed a few times.  But isn’t it amazing that when God gives you His perspective everything changes? That’s what happened to me this week. 

Andy knew early this year that it was time to retire—or be “reassigned” (because we’ll never stop doing ministry). I was ready—or so I thought. At first, I was consumed with the details of moving. We had to sell furniture and “stuff” to combine our household with my mom’s which was where we were landing. We also visited all four of our kids from May-September. We were BUSY!!

But when the dust settled, I began to wonder who I was and what I was to do. I felt like a square peg in a round hole. I didn’t know where I fit anymore. I’d been a pastor’s wife for 43 years and it was disconcerting trying to find my new role. I felt like my life had shattered. 

God used Psalm 20:4 to begin explaining things to me, “May He grant you according to your heart’s desire, and fulfill all your purpose.”  Psalm 37:4 says, “Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart.”  So I can trust my desires when I’m intimate with God. He gives them to me. 

These glass pieces represent my desires. When my circumstances changed so drastically, I felt like my life had shattered. It’s like I’d been the stained glass window above and it broke and fell apart. But as God began opening my eyes and my heart to my desires, I knew the old picture of my life had shattered.  It had to. But nothing was truly broken. My desires are the same. God’s just going to pick up the pieces to create something new. The old picture of Becky is gone.  God is creating something different—something even more beautiful from the desires of my heart. 

Heart’s Desire

What is your heart’s desire? Do you know? Have you thought about it? Where did it come from? Is it a worthy desire—or selfish? Who put it there?

Psalm 20:4 says, “May He grant you according to your heart’s desire, and fulfill all your purpose.”

I never would have put those two things together—my heart’s desire and my purpose! First of all, I haven’t trusted my desires; I’ve believed they are fleshly or selfish. And because of that, I wouldn’t have put my desires on the same level as my purpose—which I’ve understood to be God’s plan for me. 

But maybe I need to qualify my desires with Psalm 37:4, “Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart.” So if I’m delighting in the Lord, my heart’s desires are from Him! How do I know if I’m delighting in God? The picture from the Hebrew is to be “soft or delicate—intimate: to laugh with.” Are you spending time with God: sharing your heart with Him; laughing with Him? If you are, then trust that your heart’s desires are from Him! But the opposite is also true…if you haven't delighted in God, your desires will be fleshly or selfish.  

When you delight in God and follow your heart’s desires, you will fulfill your purpose. Why else would God put those desires in your heart? He knew you would need a stimulus to chase after His purpose for your life!

 

I encourage you to examine your heart’s desires—write them down. And then, ask, “How has God already used these desires to fulfill my purpose? And how does He want to use them next?”

He has a plan. 

The Week of Your Pastor

Many people have no idea what their pastor experiences in a week. In fact, if you were to shadow them, you probably couldn’t keep up or handle the emotional drain, mental tiredness, physical expenditure, or spiritual assault they experience each week. 

Let me give you a taste. Mind you…this is just in one week. Your pastor has had to:

•Prepare a sermon or two. He doesn’t flippantly choose a verse to preach on.  He studies, prays over the sermon, prays for his people to receive it. 

•Counsel. The need for counseling is growing exponentially! The average person can’t afford a professional counselor—so they’re seeking counsel from their pastor. Your pastor may have had to deal with a marriage falling apart, a teenager who is suicidal, sexual abuse, physical abuse, parents who can’t cope with their teenager’s addictions and needing help, or helping a family as they decide how to help their aging parent. You have no idea the things your pastor has had to face in just one week. It’s overwhelming to him. 

•Deal with conflict in the church. It may come from elders who disagree with the direction he’s going. It may be over finances. It could be from people in the kitchen or nursery who can’t get along. There seems to always be a conflict going on. 

•Deal with the needs of their own family. Pastors aren’t exempt from family crises. Did you know that most pastors’ wives have asked their husbands to leave the ministry at some point because of the pressure on their families? It’s a very real thing. Pastor’s kids often feel as if they have a target on their backs. 

•Plan and purchase materials for the church’s growth and outreach. 

•Deal with inner struggles. Pastors are human and the overwhelming needs they’re faced with today can take a huge toll. The pressures are endless and most pastors feel like they’re not doing enough because the needs are so great. It affects their body, soul, and spirit.  

•Minister to the sick or injured. There is always someone sick or hurt in the church and the pastor wants and needs to minister to them. But it usually comes in the form of a crises—a diagnosis of cancer, surgeries, or a car wreck. Many of those calls come in the middle of the night and the pastor rushes to pray and help. 

•Deal with expectations—either spoken or unspoken. 

•Love on the dying or the family of those dying or deceased. This may not happen every week—but just think about how many people in your church who have died this past month. Your pastor ministered to each of them. Not only does he pray with them as they’re dying, but then he meets with the family to plan a funeral and prepares a message for the funeral. 

•Plan with the staff. Regardless of the size of the church staff, your pastor has to meet and plan with someone. They have to coordinate their efforts for the week. 

•Deal with finances—either for the church or his family. He has to make sure expenditures are covered. Many times it’s hard caring for the expenses for his family when he may use his own gas to make hospital visits, have to pay for youth expenses for his kids, or for his wife to purchase books for a women’s Bible study. It’s just hard to make those dollars stretch when the needs are so great—and possibly expected. 

•Deal with extra things which may pop up bi-weekly, monthly, or yearly. Things like planning a mission trip—which is a huge undertaking with calling airlines, making deadlines, preparing the participants, and coordinating with those on the field. Or it could be hiring a new staff member—praying for the right person, interviewing, and praying the church accepts them. Or maybe it’s a building project, a mission offering, baptisms, a revival, baby dedication, communion, special holiday services, church fellowships, VBS, outreach program, connecting with visitors, ministering to the staff, children or youth camps, training or mentoring, prayer meetings—the list is endless! Even if your pastor doesn’t head all of these things, he’s involved in some way. And he may feel stretched to the max!

How can you help? Pray for your pastor! This is the most important thing. Offer to take on a project dear to your heart. Minister to your pastor and his family—whether it’s inviting them to your home for a meal, giving them a monetary gift (which is always appreciated), loving and investing in his kids, offering your vacation home to his family, or insisting they take their vacation and maybe even helping with it. Give them a sabbatical. Pastors have never needed time away, and to be ministered to themselves, like they do today. Our world is in a crisis and it’s affecting your pastor as he strives to meet the needs of your church. If you have a good pastor, you are blessed! Take care of him, encourage him (send a note or a gift), and help him. 

Pray for your pastor. And be kind. You have no idea what he’s dealt with this week. 

Despair

Do you know any family not going though something really hard or traumatic? I’ve never seen anything like it in my 67 years. In fact, my mom said she hasn’t seen anything like it in her 90 years! Satan is hitting hard—his time is short. 

Tonight, I told Andy that if we have so many friends and family members going through such hard things—and it’s all coming so fast—I can’t imagine what it will be like during the Tribulation! Either the rapture will cause so much chaos or there will be other traumatic events going on, that when the Antichrist arises and says, “Peace, peace,” that people will readily embrace his peace—and him. And there will be a semblance of peace for a time. But then will come:

•War

•Famine

•One-fourth of the people dying

•Martyrdom

•World-wide earthquake

•Stars falling from heaven

•Sky rolled up

•EVIL WILL BE UNRESTRAINED

•People wanting to die—but can’t!

•One-third of all vegetation burned up by hail & fire

•Meteor which causes 1/3 of the seas to turn to blood, 1/3 of ocean life destroyed, 1/3 of ships destroyed

•Wormwood causes 1/3 of rivers to become wormwood causing men to die

•One-third of the sun, moon, & stars go out

•Demonic locusts are loosed from hail to attack men not sealed by God

•An army from the east kills 1/3 of mankind

•God’s two witnesses will be killed but resurrected

•Antichrist will become Satan personified

•All mankind will have to have the mark of the beast to buy or sell.  Those who don’t will have their heads cut off

There will be so many horrible and traumatic things which will happen so quickly, that people will want to die. It’s going to be awful. You don’t want to live through that time. 

As hard as things are right now, we have an opportunity to avoid the Tribulation. How? By following Jesus with all of your heart! Recognize you’re a sinner and confess your sins to him. Acknowledge Jesus is God—he died for our sins, was buried, and was resurrected after three days. By that great sacrifice, he can be your savior.  You have to receive him and follow him with all of your heart!  It’s giving him ALL OF YOU!  You choose to obey him the rest of your life. How do you know how to obey him? You have to read his word to you—the Bible. 

Make sure you KNOW. So many people think that by repeating a prayer without a real heart change, they’re saved. But they haven’t given him their heart and followed him. 

As hard as things are for everyone right now, it will be minuscule compared to the atrocities of the Tribulation. Jesus said the road to him is narrow and few find it. If you’re unsure, message me.  Let’s talk.  

I’m Right!

Isn’t it amazing that we always assume we’re right? I mean…how can we ALWAYS be right? But we honestly think we are. Proverbs 16:2 says, “All the ways of man are right in his own eyes, but the Lord weighs the heart and it’s motives.” Maybe instead of trying to convince everyone we’re right, we should just ask God to put our hearts on the scales.  

Father, stop us from assuming we’re always right. Instead of arguing, cause us to stop and ask ourselves, “What if I’m wrong?” We give you permission to weigh our hearts against the Truth of Your Word. Open our ears and minds to what others are saying. Help us not to be reactive…but open, calm, and loving. Season every word we speak with grace—always grace. Remind us in every conversation that it’s better to have a relationship than to be right.  In Jesus’ name, amen.  

Changing the Watercourses

Changing the Watercourses 

Recently, my sister, Sandra Langford, was sharing with me what she’d learned about Proverbs 21:1, “The king’s heart is in the hand of the Lord. Like the rivers of water, He turns it wherever He will.”

She’d read a commentary that said that God doesn’t have to change the direction of each drop of water.  He only has to change the bank of the River to change its course!  That was so profound to me.  

Have you ever prayed for someone who is going the wrong direction—asking God to correct their course?  Me, too. And today I saw this video (click on the photo below) which illustrates this principle so well. A man dug a trench on a beach in Florida. Within an hour, the water had changed its course. 

God is able.  Turn Proverbs 21:1 into a prayer—and hang on!!!!

https://www.instagram.com/reel/Cy-0wKYIrpi/?igshid=ODhhZWM5NmIwOQ==

Slow Down & Rest

I recently posted this photo and someone asked, “How?” Everyone is busy and going at a breakneck speed—even in our churches. There is no time to rest. And yet God told us to rest. How do we stop and rest when it’s so counter-culture?

First of all, it’s a matter of obedience. God commanded us to keep the sabbath holy—set apart. He showed us by example when He rested on the seventh day after working/creating six days. Jesus often pulled aside to rest and commune with the Father. So if you want to obey God, you’ll take a day every week to stop and worship Him. You’ll spend time with Him away from the pull of the world. You'll rest your spirit, soul, and body. 

Set boundaries. The world would tell us we’re indispensable. We’re not. (Notice how quickly people are replaced when they move or die!) We don’t have to be involved in everything. If everyone was doing what they were called to do and loved to do, spots would be filled, hearts would be filled, and no one would be stressed. Instead, if a spot is empty, we often feel obligated to fill it. We need to ask these questions: If no one wants to fill this spot, is God showing us it’s no longer a valid ministry/function? Or…if I do this project, am I keeping someone (who may be on the sidelines) from doing this who would love to do it? Do I need to just ask them? Or…is there someone I need to train to do this? We all need to learn to say “no.”  There is no explanation needed when you say no. Or you can just say, “God hasn’t called me to this.”  When we learn to say “no,” it will be so much more fun when it’s time to say, “yes!” Jesus set boundaries, too. He was never in a hurry (think of Lazarus). Study His life with this in mind. Just because you know about a need, it doesn’t mean God wants to use YOU to meet that need. This truth changed my life.  

Limit your children’s activities. They don’t have to be involved in every sport. And they certainly don’t have to be involved in extra sports. Childhood should be FUN, a time of discovery, and an expanding of their knowledge. Instead, I see kids who are exhausted and stressed. They’re running from one event to another and quickly gulping down a meal before the next event. Many crash when they have a minute of free time. If you set boundaries, they may fight you…but I bet they’ll secretly be glad to slow down. Be their example. Have a family meeting and tell them you’re going to slow down as a family. Ask them what they can cut out or what they’d like to see you cut out.  You might be surprised!

Take breaks. I know this is hard to do when your house is full of kids—but that’s probably the most important time to take a break! Ask parents to babysit. Trade childcare with friends. Save money to hire a babysitter. But take time to get alone. The whole purpose should be to get away with your spouse and spend quality time together. Talk about your relationship with God and with one another. Pray together. Figure out how to slow down as a family. But also spend time alone with God and ask what He wants you to change. Press in to His heart. Commit to obey whatever He shows you. I also need time to myself—if it’s closing myself in my bedroom or borrowing a cabin and getting alone. It’s healthy to spend time with yourself and God. 

Examine your rest. Are you resting physically? Do you need a new mattress or pillow? Are you giving you and your children eight hours to rest? Are you resting emotionally? Or are your emotions all over the place? Maybe you need a good cry or a friend you can talk to. It’s ok to see a counselor, too! Are you resting mentally? Are you involved in so many projects that you can’t turn your mind off when you go to bed? It’s time to unload projects if that’s the case. Are you resting spiritually? Are you spending time with God, praying, reading the Word with the goal of being intimate with Him? This is the place you need to start. God wants to lead us to quiet pastures—away from the stresses of life.  But if we’re not spending time with Him, we won’t know where that is.  

Rest has got to start as a choice. God told us to rest and He gave the example of rest. He knows we need it! But do we know it? We’ll either choose to rest—or our bodies—and maybe our families—will pay the price. 

Rest…just rest. Step off the roller coaster of this world…slow down…and REST. 

The Word of God

The Word of God

We all know the Word of God (the Bible) is important, right? But do we really? If we were truly convinced, we’d all be reading it each and every day—multiple times a day—and even memorizing it. Why is the Word of God so important?

• It lights our way. Proverbs 6:23

• It is alive and God-breathed. Hebrews 4:12

• It pierces our hearts. Hebrews 4:12

• It judges our innermost thoughts. Hebrews 4:12

• It teaches us. II Timothy 3:16

• It reproves (convicts) us. II Timothy 3:16

• It corrects us. II Timothy 3:16

• It instructs us in righteousness (like the training and teaching of children, cultivation of mind and morals). II Timothy 3:16

• It completes us (with special aptitude for given uses…or training for your special purpose so you finish well). II Timothy 3:17

• It directs our path. Psalm 119:105

• It is pure. Proverbs 30:5

• It stands forever. Isaiah 40:8

• It brings joy to your heart. Jeremiah 15:16

• It is life. Matthew 4:4

• It brings increase. Acts 6:7

• It produces faith. Romans 10:17

• It is the sword of the Spirit. Ephesians 6:17

• It sanctifies. I Timothy 4:5

• It is not bound. II Timothy 2:9

• It is truth. II Timothy 2:15

• It is powerful. Hebrews 4:12

• It created everything. Hebrews 11:3

• It births. I Peter 1:23

• It lives forever. I Peter 1:23

• It can abide in us. I John 2:14

• People die for the Word of God. Revelation 6:9

• It will be fulfilled.  Revelation 17:17

• It is Jesus. Revelation 19:13

• It upholds us. Job 4:4

• It keeps us from stumbling. Job 4:4

• It keeps us from the path of the destroyer. Psalm 17:4

• It cleanses us. Psalm 119;9

• It keeps us from sin. Psalm 119:11

• It strengthens me. Psalm 119:28

• It brings salvation. Psalm 119:41

• It brings hope. Psalm 119:49

• It brings life. Psalm 119:50

• It is settled (taken its stand) in heaven. Psalm 119:89

• It is sweet. Psalm 119:103

• It guides my steps. Psalm 119:105

• It revives me. Psalm 119:107

• It gives light. Psalm 119:130

• It endures forever. Psalm 119:160

• It is treasure. Psalm 119:162

• It is the gospel of salvation. Ephesians 1:13

• It brings freedom. John 8:32

All of this—and so much more!! God’s Word is still alive today. As you read it, it changes you. It literally transforms your life!  It will keep you focused and much less anxious. Don’t know where to go or what to do next?  Read the Word. He’s promised to guide you, light your path and whisper behind you, “Turn left or turn right.”  He’s promised to grow you, expand you, help you, correct you, and bring you into freedom. When we’re not in the Word, we will get off track, fall into sin, and lose our way. 

Read God’s Word daily. It is LIFE!

Heaven’s Currency

Recently, I’ve been praying this: “God, would you please send me heaven’s currency?” I want to see miracles!! I want to see how God provides. I want to be in awe of God.  

Let me tell you about my first miracle since praying this prayer. Andy wanted a garage door opener for our side of the garage.  The one dad had installed was shot.  During the early Amazon Prime Day sales and after much research, I ordered one…a nice one with battery back-up. After it got here, Andy didn’t think he could install it. Knowing an overhead door company would probably want to install their own brand, we decided to send it back. 

I started the process of return and ended up having to chat with an employee. She told me it was non-returnable…but she could issue a refund.  I was told to keep the opener. Free. 

My cousin, Pat, and her husband, David, came to stay on their way to vacation and Andy jokingly asked David if he knew how to install a garage door opener. He did and wanted to help! The guys were both exhausted that night (what a way to start a vacation!) but it was up.  Andy only had to connect the wiring.  

He connected it but the door would only go up about one foot.  He worked and worked on it.  I found a video that this company had put out and it involved a button that needed to be turned. Andy finally called the company and the technician walked him through fixing the problem.  (An issue not covered in the instructions). We now have a garage door opener that works!!

Is this a miracle?  Is it currency from heaven?  You bet it is!!!  A free garage door opener. A cousin willing to work on his vacation. A technician who could problem solve. A husband willing to follow through until a garage door opener worked!  

I love heaven’s currency! My heart is filled with laughter—and I am in awe of God!!

One Choice

One Choice

We are all only one choice away from going the wrong direction. God has established boundaries to protect us. Many people see those boundaries as restrictive and malicious established by a vindictive God. But God knows that the minute you cross his boundary of life, you are in enemy territory and wide open to his attacks which are constant. It’s the enemy’s malevolent plan to destroy you and take you to the pits of hell.  

God wants to protect you from all of that.  Over and over in Proverbs, God tells us that the fear of the Lord (making a choice to listen to and obey Him) is the beginning of wisdom, life, and a good plan. God wants to protect and preserve you. Also in His goodness, He gives each of us a choice to accept or reject His good plan. 

“It’s just one choice,” you might say, “It’s not a big deal!” One choice to go across that line may even seem laughable to you. But that choice leads to another and another. Those bad choices may eventually lead you to addiction, losing your family, losing your livelihood, destruction, and death. It can happen to any of us. 

God is jealous for your choices. He wants to bless you, love you, and give you life now and forever.  Our choices are important. Following Jesus is imperative. Satan is enticing and attacking like I’ve never seen in my 67 years of life.  He.is.relentless.  The only way to overcome is to BE IN THE WORD OF GOD and follow Him!!! His boundaries are full of goodness, love, and life!

We’re only one choice away.  

The Lord is Near

“The Lord is near to all who call upon Him,
To all who call upon Him in truth.” Psalm 145:18

I read this verse yesterday and stopped. What does that even mean—to call on Him in truth? Can we call on Him untruthfully? Is it sincerity of heart? Can we call on Him with expectations in our hearts? Or is it laying everything down in humility?

I began researching and this is the Becky translation:

The Lord is intimate with those who cry out, those who read or recite, those who cry out using the name of God. The Lord is near and intimate with those who cry out to Him in truth—speaking and reciting the truth, ready to receive and give the truth. He’s near to those who come to Him humbly, truly seeking—someone who wants and is desperate for truth! To those…He is near. He is your Kinsman. 

Can you imagine this little sheep being in trouble and crying out? His shepherd is looking for him and comes running with that cry. If the lamb was willfully content and going his own way, he would never cry out. But at that cry, the shepherd comes running. That’s what happens when you cry out in truth. 

The Year of Miracles

 

Before we’d leave on a mission trip to China, Andy would have our team praying for specific things for that year. This particular year, we prayed for miracles. As it turned out, we had very little “ministry money” to take with us. Andy would always budget some ministry money which would allow us to help the people in whatever way was needed. I just remember everything was more expensive that year—airline tickets, the exchange rate, etc.  so our ministry budget was smaller.  

When we got to the airport, Andy told our team about the situation and we all began praying specifically that God would go before us and expand our ministry and our ministry money. We asked to see a real “loaves and fishes” experience where God would multiply our money or that it would never run out.

Andy was meticulous with our record keeping. Every night, after a hard day of ministry, out would come the money bag with our handmade receipts.  We were in a rural area of China and no one gave receipts. In fact, at that time, even large cities didn’t give receipts. Since our church required receipts, we would write down what we spent as our day progressed. And every night, we still had the same amount of money. 

I wish I could remember what all we did to help people that year. It seems like it was the year one of our young girls was in the hospital. And I use that term loosely. Just imagine what our hospitals were like in 1900. This fifteen-year-old girl shared a room with an old man and everyone who came to visit him was smoking in the room. The IV she had was rubber tubing attached to a glass bottle. Food wasn’t served to the patients.  They would remove their own IV and go across the street to get food and wait for a nurse to reattach the IV when they got back. It was shocking! So we would go and buy her food and take it to her. And when we couldn’t go, we would send a local person with the money to take care of her. We paid for her hospital stay which came to about $100.  

Over and over, every single night…Andy would pour the money on our bed and count it and compare it to the receipts…and it never measured up. We always had more money. We would have a team meeting every night and Andy would tell our team how God was supplying for every need.  We were in awe!

I remember on the way home, we encountered another need which required the remaining ministry money. We went home having spent every single penny we’d taken—but our records showed we’d spent about 7X what we’d taken! It’s one of the most amazing things I’ve ever seen. 

I want to always remember…God is the same yesterday, today, and forever. He still multiplies the loaves and fishes.  

Psalm 139

I memorized Psalm 139:23-24 years ago this way: “Search me, O God, and know my heart; try me, and know my thoughts; see if there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting. 

Here’s what I understood with my black & white thinking: Judge my heart and keep me out of sin.  

I looked up each word in the Blue Letter Bible (original Hebrew) as my sister, Sandra, and I discussed each word. This is the Becky Translation:

I open the door of my heart to you and invite you in for inspection. Examine my heart intimately. Use your power of observation and discern what is there.  Examine, scrutinize, and perceive my disquieting, anxious thoughts (my anxiety) which are troubling me. Consider my sorrow and pain (physical or mental). Take into account my idolatrous ways and the journeys I’ve taken with bad habits. Guide me to you. Forgive me. Restore me. Lead me into an intimate relationship with you which will last forever. 

This interpretation is of a loving father accepting his traumatized child’s invitation to rescue him and lead him into restoration, healing, grace, love, and redemption—and away from trauma, anxiety, pain, sorrow, bad habits, sin and the effects of sin! God exposes lies and reveals truth which brings freedom. The result is a beautiful life which knows no end. 

It will be worth it if you open your heart to God and let him examine it.  

The GOOD Shepherd

Let Him carry you tonight.  

Life is hard. Things are coming too fast. It’s exhausting and overwhelming. It creates anxiety, sadness, and even loneliness. 

But Jesus WANTS to carry you. He will anoint you with His oil to cover you and protect you. He IS peace and wants to fill your heart, mind, and soul with His peace. He wants to comfort you, hold you close, and sing over you. Listen.  Do you hear that song? It’s one of love and meant for your heart alone. He wants you to know He will never abandon you. In fact, he’s been chasing you down! He doesn’t want you doing this hard life alone. He will walk beside you, guiding you, and talking to you. He will also pick you up and carry you when things get too difficult. He wants you to know His voice so you won’t be deceived by the one who wants to destroy you. He is jealous for you! He will lovingly bring you through. Trust him. 

He is for you. He is the GOOD shepherd.

The Name of the Lord

Psalm 124:8 says, “Our help is in the name of the Lord who made heaven and earth.”

I’ve learned how important names are—His and ours. So what is His name? What’s wrapped up in his name?

The name of the Lord is…

El—God who is mighty, strong, and prominent

Elohim—Creator, mighty and strong

El Shaddai—God almighty

El Elyon—Most High

El Roi—The God Who Sees

Adonai—Lord

Alpha & Omega—Beginning & The End

Abba—Father

Attiq Yomin—Ancient of Days

YHWH—LORD

Qanna—Jealous God

Qedosh Israel—Holy One of Israel

Immanuel—God with us

Hupsistos Theos—The Most High God

Logos—The Word

Or Goyim—Light of Nations

El-Elohe-Israel—God, the God of Israel

El Gibor—The Mighty God

El Olam—The Everlasting God

Jehovah Jireh—The Lord will provide

Jehovah Rapha—The Lord who heals

Jehovah Nissi—The Lord our banner

Jehovah Sel’i—My Rock

Jehovah M’Kaddesh—The Lord who makes holy

Jehovah Shalom—The Lord our peace

Jehovah Chereb—Glorious Sword

Jehovah Go’el—Redeemer

Jehovah Hamelech—The King

Jehovah Heshopet—Judge

Jehovah Hoshe’ah—The Lord Who Saves

Jehovah Kabodhi—My Glory

Jehovah Machsi—My Refuge

Jehovah Magen—The Shield

Jehovah Ma’ozi—My Fortress

Jehovah Mephalti—My Deliverer

Jehovah Moshi’ech—Your Savior

Jehovah ‘Ori—My Light

Jehovah Uzi—My Strength

Jehovah Elohim—LORD GOD

Jehovah Tsidkenu—Lord our righteousness

Jehovah Rohi—The Lord our shepherd

Jehovah Shammah—The Lord is there

Jehovah Sabbaoth—Lord of hosts

Jehovah Eloheenu—The Lord our God

Jehovah Hoseenu—The Lord our Maker

Jehovah Mekaddishkem—The Lord our Sanctifier

Jehovah Makkeh—The Lord Who Strikes

Jehovah Tsuri—The Lord is my rock

Jehovah N’Kaddesh—God my Holiness

I AM—The Everlasting One

THAT’S who you’re calling on today…and so much more!

Prophetic Peace Covenant for Israel

Daniel 9 tells us that the Antichrist will make a peace covenant with Israel some day in the future. Just like Israel becoming a nation signified the beginning of the last days, this covenant will signify the beginning of the Tribulation. 

I’ve often wondered why this covenant would be needed. In my lifetime, Israel has only grown stronger. Their war with the Arabs in 1967 only lasted 6 days with an Israeli victory.  In 1973, they battled one another again for 20 days which ended in a cease-fire. There have been skirmishes constantly between Israelis and Arabs which is why so many American presidents have tried to establish peace treaties between the two. 

But what could be happening politically or militarily that a new world leader could step up to the plate and offer “world peace” through a peace covenant with Israel—and that they would accept it? 

It’s becoming clearer, isn’t it?

Psalm 119

Psalm 119 is the longest chapter in the Bible. Did you know every single verse says something about the Word of God?  My mentor shared that with me years ago. I can’t help looking for it every time I read it. It may not say “word,” it may use words like:

  •Precepts

  •Law

  •Commandments

  •Statutes

  •Judgments

  •Testimonies

  

You get the idea. Now you can be looking for them. Did you know the Holy Spirit will teach you as you read the Word of God? He’s the best teacher you will ever have! But you have to choose to be a student. Open that book and read!! Because when you do, Psalm 119:50 says, “Your Word has given me life!”  Psalm 119:97-104 tells us that we can have more understanding than our teachers or the ancients—because He teaches us! The Word will also guide our steps and light our paths according to verses 105-106, 130. He’ll show us exactly where to go and give us understanding and discernment. The Word redirects us when we’re going the wrong way. (Vs. 9)  One of the most amazing things God gives us through His Word is peace. “Great peace have those who love your law and nothing causes them to stumble,” according to verse 165.

The older I get, the more I live and observe, there is nothing more powerful than embracing and filling yourself with the Word of God. Money will fail you. People will fail you. Drinking will fail you. Going your own way will fail you. But God’s Word WILL NEVER FAIL YOU!!  

“Forever, O Lord, Your word is settled in heaven. Your faithfulness endures to all generations.” Psalm 119:89-90. 

Read His Word. Embrace it. Let the Spirit of God teach you. And then you will truly LIVE!!!

The Tomato Worm

I was probably 7-years-old when it happened. It was summertime and I’d played hard all day. I loved making mud pies; sometimes adding dad’s green tomatoes to create culinary wonders! Dad had a green thumb and had lots of beautiful tomatoes so I never got into too much trouble over chopping one or two. Mom had done laundry and hung clothes on the clothesline to dry. I was her helper—handing her clothespins as she hung each article of clothing on the line. I didn’t mind helping. I loved watching the sheets flap in the breeze and I liked being a helper.  

That night, I fell asleep quickly. Since I was the only girl in the house at the time, I had my own bedroom. I remember hurting and moaning even in my sleep. My arm was hurting. I guess I began whimpering and my dad came into my room and said, “Becky! What’s wrong?” I whimpered and said, “My arm hurts!”  Dad came over and wanted to know where it hurt. He raised my arm and exclaimed, “It’s a tomato worm!” Sure enough, a tomato worm had somehow gotten on my pajamas as they hung on the clothesline and it had crawled under my armpit.  Dad took it and got rid of it and I went back to sleep. 

You know…sin is a lot like that tomato worm. It moves in slowly and insidiously. But once it digs in, there’s pain and and a price to pay. Satan cares nothing about you. We are pawns in his effort to triumph over God. He honestly thinks he’ll win. He delights to entangle us in sin to thumb his nose at God. But God…God is like my dad that night. Just like my dad asked, “What’s wrong?,” God wants us to admit what we’ve done. Then it’s nothing for him to pick up that sin and toss it away so we never see it again. God will win. 

Whose side do we want to be on? If you want to be on God’s side, confess your sin and repent (turn away from sin). Tell him that you choose to follow him. Then follow him. Read his Word (the Bible) and talk to him. Obey him. 

Remember…God WILL win!

Bronze Serpent

Did you know the children of Israel carried the bronze serpent around for about 750 years? Why?

First of all, I believe they kept it because God told them to make it. You remember the story. Moses was leading the children of Israel through the wilderness and they began complaining about Moses’ leadership and God’s provision. So God sent fiery serpents among them and many of the people died. When they repented, God told Moses to make a fiery serpent out of bronze and lift it up on a pole and anyone who looked at it would be healed. (Every ambulance tells this gospel story with their symbol—look next time!). The fiery serpent was a picture of Satan and sin. The bronze serpent on a pole was a foretelling of Jesus being lifted up on the cross—and everyone who looks to him in faith will be healed spiritually.  

So God told them to make it and they didn’t know it was a one-time thing.  Maybe they thought they better keep it in case more serpents came. It could be that as years passed, it became like a “good luck charm.” But more than that, people eventually began offering incense to it. Isn’t it interesting how quickly people replace worshiping God with worshiping something they can see or touch? Or at the very least, people are determined to worship God their way instead of the way He desires and has laid out for us. 

Hezekiah was the king who destroyed it. He knew the people’s hearts were wrong. No more offering incense to the serpent. God commended him for it. 

Have we offered incense to a bronze serpent? Are we fixated on a miracle in the past and worship there? Are we worshiping God OUR way instead of His way? Are we worshiping the past and constantly wishing things were the same—or that worship songs were the same? Are we looking for a physical representation of God to worship? Has something like a cell phone taken the place of God?

It’s time to crush some bronze serpents. 

Rain in China

We’d taken our usual group of adults to China, but this particular year, we included a group of high school and college kids. We’d spent our first week in the city teaching English to elementary students. The second week, we went to a rural area in the mountains and taught middle school kids. We’d taken our teenagers on a hike to the Yangtze River and on our way back, we saw a family watering their field—by hand. This area of China was experiencing one of the worst droughts (during their monsoon season) they’d ever had which meant more work for these poor farmers. We all kept bottled water with us to avoid altitude sickness and since I was leading the way, I raised my water bottle to the family and asked if we could help. Of course, they didn’t speak English, so Andy and our interpreter walked over to them and got their permission to help. It would have taken their family all day to water that field but it  took mere minutes with our crowd helping! After we were finished, Andy had our interpreter tell them that we were going to pray to the One True God and ask him for rain. They thanked him. 

That night after dinner, we gathered outside below the open restaurant and began to worship and pray for rain. We knew there were some government officials eating above us and what we were doing wasn’t really permissible, but we were intent on keeping our word. A waitress came down and told Andy the government officials wanted to know what we were doing. Andy said, “Tell them we’re praying to the One True God and asking him to send rain!” We soon heard laughter after she relayed the information. We began praying.  

It was dark as we began praying. Several people had prayed and I happened to look up. I whispered, “Andy. Andy!  Look behind you!” Behind the Himalayas was a small cloud rising with lightening. Andy gasped and every kid looked up. We were so excited and our prayers became much more fervent. We finished our time praising God, believing rain was coming. 

The rain began as a soft shower about 3 a.m.  By the time most of us woke up, a nice, full rain was falling all around us. The farmers we’d helped the day before showed up at our motel and wanted to talk to Andy. They kept saying, “Must be miracle! Must be miracle!” Through an interpreter, Andy got to tell them about the One True God. 

We’d begun giving scholarships to one student each year so a girl (boys had to stay and help on the farm) could go on to high school in a larger city. This was a big deal. We supplied the scholarship but the teachers and principal chose the worthy student. The parents might walk for a day to see their daughter receive the award. And…there was no auditorium or gymnasium. Any time the students met as a body, it was outside. So our ceremony was set to happen that day—in the rain. 

We gathered our group together and told them we needed to ask God to stop the rain for 30 minutes so we could make the presentation. The kids were due to come outside any minute. We prayed. The rain stopped. We made the presentation and as soon as the students began walking back to class, the rain started again. 

One of our adults kept their eye on the weather for this area after we came home. It rained for weeks. The drought was broken. More importantly, a Chinese family knew about the One True God!

Led by Peace?

I’ve often heard people say, “God will lead you by his peace.” Is that true? Often…but not always.  Let me give you an example.  

Early in our ministry, we were invited to come interview with a church in a different state. We were so happy in the church we were in that I couldn’t imagine leaving it! But because we knew the pastor issuing the invitation, we were interested. So we met with their youth committee. We had a great time getting to know all of those lovely people. 

But once we got to our motel room that night, I couldn’t quit crying! I didn’t know what was wrong. I’m sure Andy was so confused because he kept reassuring me we didn’t have to come.  I just kept saying, “Something’s wrong here!”

The next morning, we met with the pastor and his wife. They told us some things about the church and let us know they’d love it if we came. I asked, “Why are you here?” I had to know. If someone as black and white as this pastor was in this church, I had to know why. Maybe it would help make sense of my feelings. He basically said, “God had been teaching me some principles in my former church that I knew I needed to practice somewhere else.”

The night that the church voted on us, our little family was waiting in the pastor’s office. I couldn’t quit crying!! I just kept saying, “There’s something wrong here!” And Andy kept saying, “We don’t have to come!” Finally, I said, “Yes we do! I know God is leading us here, but WHY?” We went in front of the church (red face and all) and accepted their call.  

There WAS something wrong in that church. There was sin—and a spirit of control. I look back on that experience and am still amazed that the Spirit of God so clearly showed me how out of order things were in that church. What’s so crazy is that most of the people were great. The youth were exceptional. But the church was out of order. 

I believe God revealed how out of order things were—to prepare us. We counted the cost and accepted the mission. We encountered many hard things while we were there. But it was also where we grew…and where God defined our ministry. 

Will God lead you by his peace?  Yes, at times. But he may also show you a future filled with persecutions and have you count the cost before you say “yes.”

I’ve found both to be his way.  

Starving Newlyweds

We’d only been married a few months…and were really hungry. When we married, Andy was singing with Vicki & The Royalheirs—music evangelists who sang at churches, revivals, and concerts.  Andy made a whopping $200/month. I contributed about that much working at White’s Auto for the first three months of our marriage, but ultimately decided if I wanted to see my husband, I needed to quit my job and travel with him. So now, we were down to $200/month and our rent was $160/month. We had very little for groceries, so we ate a lot of popcorn and Rice-a-Roni. We were always glad to get back on the road because churches would feed us. 

This had gone on for a few months and I remember coming to God and pouring out my heart, “God, I’m really tired of popcorn! (I imagine God was remembering another time and another people—complaining about manna). Would you please give us some meat? Please??”

Royce Grant, the leader of Vicki & The Royalheirs, called us and said our friends in Oklahoma had called and wanted us to come eat with them. They had cattle and had butchered a cow and wanted to feed us steaks. I could have cried! I was thanking God all the way to Oklahoma. After a wonderful meal with MEAT, they told us they were sending us home with a side of beef to share. 

For months, I praised God every time I opened our freezer and pulled out a package of hamburger! God heard and God cared about a newlywed who was tired of popcorn. 

The Small Stuff

Do you think God cares about the small stuff? I do. Let me tell you a story…

We were living in Broken Arrow, Oklahoma where Andy was a youth minister at First Baptist Church. He was gone on a youth trip—and I was home with four small kids. A friend (with small children) was sick and I’d told her I would bring a meal to them at 5:30. No stress! I was used to doing everything with kids hanging on my legs. 

It was 5:10 and the meal was ready and I was about to 

load kids and food in the car—and began looking for my keys. They were nowhere to be found! I just knew I’d laid them on the coffee table by my purse, but they weren’t there. I asked Matt & Amy (7 & 6-years-old) if they’d seen them and we were all looking. David was three and Zach was one and crawling—fast! Time was ticking…and no keys.  I was about to panic. Anyone I could call for help lived too far away to help me get to my friend’s house on time.  

I sat down and prayed. I said, “God, I know you know where those keys are.  I need help! You know I really want to help this family tonight and I can’t go anywhere without those keys. Please show me where they are.” The thought came into my mind to get on my hands and knees to look. The thief of the keys was small—and crawling.  

I got on my knees and crawled all over the living room and kitchen. Then I noticed the entry coat door was open. I crawled over there. I looked through everything on the floor of that closet. And then I noticed my brown Electrolux canister vacuum was standing up and the hose was detached—and there was a hole gaping just waiting for keys. I hit the button and opened the space for the vacuum bag and heard keys jangling. I tore the bag open and retrieved my keys. 

I can promise I would NEVER have found those keys on my own!! God answered my prayer and showed me how to find them.  

We delivered food right on time. 

How Much Does a Baby Cost?

We were pregnant with our first baby in 1978. Andy was traveling and singing, so on this day of my doctor’s appointment, he wasn’t with me. The appointment went well—mostly weighing and taking my blood pressure.  This was way before sonograms and knowing if you were having a boy or girl beforehand! I remember the cashier telling me I needed to go to the small hospital in town to register. So I did. Alone. As I filled out the papers, the man asked me how much I was going to put down as a deposit. He explained that because we had no insurance, we’d have to have the bill completely paid before the birth. I looked up and fear washed over me. I’d barely been able to pay for my doctor’s appointment that day. (We hardly made enough money to pay rent and utilities.). But faith rose up in me and I looked the man square in the eyes and told him God would provide it before the baby was born. He laughed. 

Andy came home from his trip and I told him what I’d done and how the man had laughed. I’d fluctuated between fear and faith the whole time Andy was gone. If I remember correctly, I was crying and asked him, “What are we going to DO?” And he replied, “We’re going to ask God to provide!”

Days and weeks went by and we were praying our hearts out—asking God to provide this exorbitant hospital bill. One afternoon, someone knocked on our door. When I opened it, there stood my high school friend and her mother. After they came in, the mom explained that they had paid themselves a bonus (they owned a trucking company) and they felt like God had told them to give it to us. We were overwhelmed—and oh, so grateful!

I’ll never forget the look on that man’s face when I took everything I owed and paid my hospital bill in full. I looked him in the eye and said, “God provided!”

Ruth…and me!

Ruth’s story is my story. Boaz was her deceased husband’s near relative and he became everything for her. He was her protector, provider, and became the father of her child. 

But why was Boaz so eager to help Ruth? He saw how she left her homeland and her gods to follow her mother-in-law, Naomi, to her country and to worship her God. Not only did she follow Naomi, she went to work in Boaz’s field to provide for her.  She worked hard. Eventually, Ruth submitted to Naomi’s counsel and to Boaz’s covering. These things caused Boaz to protect her, provide for her, and eventually give her a son. 

I have a daughter-in-law who is teaching her small children that “we’re not afraid to work hard!” And she teaches by example. She’ll dig a ditch to repair plumbing, she’ll caulk all of the trim on the outside of the house, she’ll even lay flooring. Her kids are learning through her example. And we are all drawn to help her because she fearlessly tackles any job.  

Don’t you think Boaz saw how hard Ruth worked—just like we see how hard my daughter-in-law works? He saw how she compassionately took care of her mother-in-law when she didn’t have to. Because she chose to leave her old life and follow God, Boaz became her kinsman-redeemer. He married her, provided for her, and gave her a child.  

Boaz is a picture of Jesus. And when we choose to follow God, we are Ruth. Jesus then covers us, protects us, and provides for us. Jack Hayford, in his book, The Mary Miracle, says all believers are pregnant with a miracle like Mary experienced. God wants to birth something through each of us. 

Have you left everything to follow God?  What does Jesus see in you? What is he birthing through you right now?