Seasons of Love

Andy & I were asked to speak at a Valentine's banquet last night and we ended up speaking on the Seasons of Love.  We just talked about the things God has taught us in each season of our lives.  So I thought I'd share.  Andy started each season by singing a song (in bold).

DREAM
Dating season.  I was taught to pray that God would prepare me for my spouse...and to prepare my spouse for me. When I began praying that at 12 years of age, Andy was 18!  Andy & I met on a blind date--six years later.  (Thanks, Dennis & Donna!)  We thought the other person was perfect.  We had stars in our eyes and couldn't wait to marry.  All I can say is you're pretty unrealistic about marriage--before you marry. 

WE'VE ONLY JUST BEGUN
Marriage.  We learned the other person wasn't perfect.  There were struggles over things like toilet paper and toothpaste.  But we'd been counseled well to never use the word "divorce."  (Plus, my Momma & Daddy told me I could never come back home--this was a forever deal!)  We were also taught to "receive" one another.  It was good groundwork for our marriage.

BABY, BABY
This was a season we thought would never end--because--having 4 children in 6 years, we stayed in the diaper/sleepless/foggy stage for years.  We were taught to give our children to God and to point them from day one to the target of God's will---not what we wanted them to become.  And we were told that our goal was to teach them to love God and to prepare them to leave home as responsible adults.

TAKE ME OUT TO THE BALLGAME
This season was filled with going to our children's sporting and school events.  One of the most important things I think we did as a family was to sit down each evening and eat dinner together.  We were also told to take advantage of "teachable moments" to guide our children.  We learned about the differences in our children's personalities and to guide and discipline them accordingly.

WILD THING
Parenting teenagers is a wild ride!!  We knew it was so important to parent our children---and not to be their best friends.  Children are looking for boundaries which will make them feel secure and loved.  We also began to learn to let the Holy Spirit reveal things we needed to know about them--and what they were doing!

WTSU
(Andy's college fight song--you can tell his age--this school name no longer exists! ha!)  It honestly wasn't difficult to let our kids go.  I think it was because we'd purposed from the beginning to point them to the target of God's will and prepare them to be responsible adults--and they loved God!!  (Not that we'd done all this perfectly, mind you!)  In fact, what we learned through this season was to not bail our children out of difficulties.  They needed to grow through their difficulties and become independent.  (That was hard.)  Our prayer life became stronger, too.  But the benefit was that we began to become friends during this season with our children.  

WE'VE ONLY JUST BEGUN
When we were having babies, we didn't consider the cost of college and weddings of children so close together!  Our first two children were married within 4 months of one another.  And our third child was married only 11 months later.  It was during this season we were hit with how much we hadn't taught our children---and how poorly we had prepared them for life.  I think every parent faces this at some point.  But God was faithful to point out to us that we hadn't learned everything by the time we married--and He considered it His privilege to continue their education.  In fact...our job of teaching was over.  We were only there to pray and offer advice if asked.

DREAM
An empty nest...and a new opportunity to dream!  It's almost like starting over.  The good news is, everyone is off of your payroll and it's like you have a pay increase.  So not only do you have opportunity to do new things, you also probably have the money to do it!  It's a chance to do ministry together, travel, and find things you mutually enjoy.  Of course, it's important that you've invested in your marriage--or you'll find yourself living with a total stranger!  That's why you see divorces among people who've been married for 35 years.  But of course, the greatest reward in this season of love is having those beautiful grandchildren!!

Andy & I determined early on to enjoy each season of our lives.  And I can say we honestly have.  (Some seasons were enjoyed "louder" than others, mind you!)  I'm so grateful for people who poured into us---some people didn't even know they were teaching us, but they did.  Is there anything we'd change if we could? Absolutely!!   Unfortunately, you learn the most about parenting as your job is ending.  But I'm so grateful that God is a redeeming God.  I'm grateful for the children God gave me.  I'm grateful for their spouses.  I'm grateful for 8 grandchildren--who are perfect!  And I'm grateful that I've gotten to enjoy the seasons of love with Andy--and I believe the best is yet to come.  God sure knew what He was doing.

I love you, Andy Dietz!  What a great ride.