Anxious

Every time we pack a bag, Bear gets anxious. His big questions is, “Will I get to go??” And then when I begin packing his things, he gets so excited! The morning of the big trip, he watches to see if I fill his water bottle. When I do, he begins running in circles and then from one end of the house to the other, looking for a way of escape to make sure he gets in the car! He doesn’t begin to settle down until he’s about 30 minutes into the trip and has had a drink from his water bottle.  His anxiety spikes again as he begins to figure out where we’re going.  Call me crazy—but he knows! At least he knows if it’s Tulsa, Dallas, or Red River where three of our kids live. He recognizes their neighborhoods and begins yelping—wanting out of the car!!

Yesterday, as I watched his anxiety all over again, I began to see myself. I get anxious when God has me at a full-on stop! Has He forgotten me? Am I going to get to go into the world and affect His kingdom? Why am I still at home? And when I see movement, I wonder, “Is this it? Am I going to get to go? Can I share the love and good news of Jesus with the world? Or is everyone else going—and I’m left home again? As God picks up MY things and begins preparing them, I’m about to off rhe charts with excitement!  It’s for me! It’s for ME!!! 

Sometimes the better part of our walk with Christ is being still. But oh, how I chafe at being still. I should be content with spending intimate time with God. But I’m a doer—I love the action. And I don’t want to be left out on what God is DOING!!! I know each season is important. You’d think I’d have it down by now—but I don’t.  

I’m just like Bear—anxious to not be left behind!!