A Minister Needs Help

Stu & Debi with Ellie Kate

These are my friends, Stu & Debi Tully.  We were on staff with Stu and his wife, Debi, when we were at a church in Oklahoma.  I’d lost touch with them until we found one another on Facebook.  It was so fun catching up with them.  But recently my heart has been burdened as I’ve watched what they’ve walked through with their two granddaughters, Ellie Kate (7) and Lucy (3).  Both girls were born with a rare genetic disorder which is terminal.  Ellie Kate seems to be losing her battle with this disease and may soon be in the precious arms of Jesus.  I can’t imagine what this family has walked through.  It’s been hard to read the updates on Facebook as they’ve been in and out of the hospital time after time and are physically, spiritually, mentally, and emotionally exhausted.

Stu began a missions organization years ago and has traveled all over the world sharing the good news of Jesus Christ.  He’s been one of God’s faithful ones.  In the past few months, he’s struggled over where to be.   When he’s home, he’s dedicated himself to his family–staying at the hospital with the girls so mom and dad could rest while Debi has stayed with the 2 boys at home and washed clothes, cooked, etc.  It’s been a tag-team operation so each adult could grab some rest when they could.  (Ellie Kate & Lucy’s parents, Michael & Ryan are beyond exhausted…and grieving, as you can imagine !)  My heart has ached.

Yesterday, in his post entitled “Hope for Hopeless Times,”  Stu made mention of how ministry funding had hit an all-time low….right here at Christmas…while he’s helping his family…while his granddaughter is slipping away.  I can’t even imagine.    Of course, funds are set up for Ellie Kate which help with her medical bills and her immediate family.  But there’s nothing set up for the grandparents who are dedicating their lives to help their family at this time.

It’s CHRISTMAS!  How can I help these ministers dependent on donations from God’s people?  By letting you know about this need.  Would you please consider stopping over atStu’s ministry website and making a donation?  You can make a donation by credit/debit card, Paypal, or by sending a check to the address posted.  I’m not asking you to become a regular supporter–although God may lay that on your heart!  Even if it’s only $10, $25, or $100…if we all make a one-time donation, it might help them get through this hard season of their lives.  Would you consider being the hands of Jesus for Stu & Debi?  And if you’re already a faithful supporter of this ministry, would you consider making a Christmas donation?  Please…just pray about it.  And thank you.

Sweet Ellie Kate

Journaling

Because I'm writing about my perspective of what was happening in Borger, TX when Andy was held hostage in Budapest for his book, I had to dig out my journal from 1998 to confirm details.  And because I went to the trouble of digging it out, I decided to read the rest of that journal.  I'm so thankful I journal.  It gives such great insight into what God is doing and has done in your life.

When I journal, I write down all of my thoughts.  There's very little I leave out.  I can only think of a few times when I didn't journal what was happening (or what I was feeling) for fear that person might read my journal some time and be hurt by it.  So I journal everything for the most part.  But I also listen for the voice of God.  And I write down His part of our conversation.  Do I always hear Him?  No.  Do I always correctly hear Him?  No.  But as I read this journal this week, I was awed by some of the things He'd told me.  I was also surprised by some of the things that were going through my head at the time.  But through it all, the thing that amazed me the most was seeing the beautiful picture of God's grace in my life.

I'd like to explain.  This is painfully honest.  But I want to make myself vulnerable in hopes someone who doesn't already journal will be inspired to do so.

This is from June 23, 1998.  "Today God revealed the stronghold of rejection in my life.  It began with thinking on comments made by some people about my gift of prophecy or my desire to lead--in a negative manner.  It hurt.  I felt rejected by them.  Then wave after wave of memory came back of past rejections...(I list people here)  I also felt rejected by God because He didn't give to me.  Then I began rejecting others before I was rejected--or as I saw signs of rejection."

From August 26, 1998.   "What do you want, Becky?  First, I want to be focused on you.  And I want to love (and not judge) my neighbor.  I want to speak and hold audiences captive with Truth!  I want to open doors to the abundant, free life!  I want to pray and I want to do light counseling.  God, why has my mind been so screwed up?  After I wrote what I wanted, I felt like it was invalid--like I didn't deserve, shouldn't desire what I wanted.  Like it was too fun and not hard enough work.  Like I should be scrubbing, sorting, cleaning and doing laborious counseling.   What's wrong with this?

Nothing's wrong.  You've never accepted your desires as My desires for your life.   Becky, I want to loose you to become who I created you to become.  I didn't create you to be a behind-the-scenes person.  I created you to be out front and vocal.  I created you to speak with authority.  You and I know you're not afraid of or resist hard, dirty work.  But you're a mouth...not a hand, ok?  You were trying to prove your love to Me.  You thought by doing hard, dirty work you would please me.  Cinderella, I want you to rise out of the ashes and come to the ball with Me!"

Fast forward to 2012.  I look back over the past 5 1/2 years of being the director of Living Water and see the mind-transforming, life-changing work God has done through this position!  God has metamorphosized me.  I became comfortable with the gifts He's given me.  I've embraced my gift of prophecy, my leadership skills, and my ability to speak with authority.  I've stepped up and out.  In fact, I hardly recognize the Becky of 1998.  And I wouldn't have even been so aware of the transformation if I hadn't stepped back in time through my journal.  I was also very touched by the graciousness of God.  I was making so many mistakes and walking in so much fear.  But God didn't condemn me.  He kept speaking to me lovingly and encouraging me to embrace who He'd created me to be.

If you don't journal...man, I encourage you to!  And if you don't listen for God's voice, start.  You'll be amazed.