Seven Years

Tomorrow will be 7 years since Liz Dietz went to heaven. This morning, I read back through every post I made about her journey on FB and cried—remembering the hard and the sweet. I clearly remember the day Andy & I took her to a doctor’s appointment in Amarillo and stopped at her favorite restaurant, Olive Garden. She ordered food and then decided she’d wait in the car. I knew in that moment I’d be moving in with her and caring for her. Andy & I talked about it over that meal. That was in January. I moved in the next day  She died May 4.  

Liz had vulva cancer. It’s an ugly, horrible cancer and is very painful. It was so hard to keep her pain-free. I can remember ministering to her and she’d say, “I never thought my daughter-in-law would have to do this!” I’d say, “Me neither!” And we’d both laugh. 

You may not know this, but Liz and I had a difficult relationship. I married the first twin—and it was hard for her to let go. Plus I was fighting for acceptance—in every wrong way, I’m sure. Her cancer journey was healing for both of us. She finally knew I loved her and she thanked me often. It was also hard. I kept asking God (as I’d sit at the nursing home with her for hours), “Are you sure this is what I need to be doing??” It was monotonous. But God knew that the consistency of my presence would speak love to Liz. 

A couple of moments stand out to me. One was when every door closed to keep her in the nursing home. We had to take her home. I shut down emotionally and mentally. I was also exhausted physically.  I had worked for weeks with the help of my sister-in-law, Amy (an estate lawyer), to keep her in the nursing home—but bureaucratic red tape kept it from happening.  We had no idea how long she’d live at that point, and all I could see was caring for her all by myself for an extended period of time. (That never happened throughout the journey. Family always jumped in to help! But I couldn’t see that in the moment through the fog of exhaustion and disappointment.). I was completely overwhelmed. 

The other moment was while she was still in the nursing home. Liz did NOT want to die. She had a hard time letting go of everything here. She was asleep one day and I stood over her and said, “Let go, in Jesus’ name!” About the third time I said it, she woke up and had heard me.  😳🤣. She looked me dead in the eye and said, “I will. But you have to pick up the baton and carry it.”  I assured her I would. What baton was that? I knew immediately—the baton of sharing Christ and praying for the family. Those were the two things we knew her for most!

Two nights before she died, I was sleeping in her room to be near in case she needed me and she talked to people in heaven all night long. She’d been talking to her sister, Beverly, and her husband, Bob. And she said, “I’m coming!  Just give me a minute!”   🤣 

We talk about Liz a lot. One of our favorite things she’d say was a long drawn-out, “Welllllllll, honey!”  It was kind of like a southern, “Bless your heart!” But if she didn’t agree with you, you’d just get a, “Welllllll…” 

Liz loved the Lord and she loved people!! She led many people to Christ and discipled them. Seven years have flown by. I’m so grateful we finished well with our relationship. And I think she’d be pleased to know the majority of her family are carrying the baton!

*This photo is my favorite of her. Ricky Garzon had come to her room and played his guitar and led us in worship. Liz was worshiping.

Control

We try to control things, don’t we?  We want a good outcome and think if we control things, it will be better. We try to control spouses, children, circumstances, employees, systems, and basically anything that touches our lives. We want things (or people) the way we want them. 

Is there anywhere that God gives us that kind of control?  I can’t find it. You might say, “But we’re to submit to one another—and children are to submit to parents.” Isn’t submission a choice of that other person? We’re certainly to train our children and teach them to obey—and sometimes that involves consequences. Discipling children is teaching them to obey God by learning to obey you. (I wish I’d used the term “discipling” in my head instead of “disciplining” when raising my children. That one switch-up makes a lot of difference in how you train your children!)

My point is the only thing God tells us to control is ourselves. Self-control. And the interesting thing is—it’s a fruit of the Spirit! WE CAN’T EVEN CONTROL OURSELVES WITHOUT THE HELP OF GOD!! Self-control is an outcome of abiding in the Spirit. 

Our eyes focus on everything and everyone around us. God intends for us to look upward. Why do we feel out of control and start grabbing at people and circumstances, trying to control outcomes? Because our focus may be on the bad behavior of others. We’ve forgotten God is in control. Fear has moved in where faith should reside. We need to walk in faith and abide in the Spirit and give Him complete control of us. 

And then—pray our hearts out for those we want to control. 

Grace of God

Do you know what’s going on in the lives of your church members? Do you need to be shaken a bit so the doors of your heart open wider to those around you? Is God calling you to invest in others? Order this book today!!

I spoke at a women’s retreat this past Saturday. A woman came up to me afterwards and unassumingly told me she’d written a book and handed it to me. It was a short encounter. But boy—was God making a powerful impact!

I came home and read her book. Her story has shaken me. I won’t spoil the story for you—but just let me say, “You may have a child sitting in your church who is being abused. You may have a woman who is about to step over the edge mentally and emotionally and doesn’t know where to turn. You are most assuredly surrounded by needs!”  We can “play church”…or we can roll up our sleeves and help those God has brought to us. God always uses a two-edged scalpel—one side to help those in trouble and the other side to teach the helpers. 

I remember the first time God asked me to help someone. I told the woman in crisis, “I don’t have all the answers—but God does! I can walk with you and pray with you and we can let God teach us.”   That’s all you need to know to help others. In fact, in Cathy’s book, you’ll see that the people who ministered to her most just sat with her quietly. 

Again…read the book. And raise your hand and tell God, “Pick me!” Let’s do more than sit in church and rub shoulders with people. Let’s partner with God and help others come out of the darkness and into God’s great and marvelous light!

Change…or Growth?

A couple of days ago, God spoke this to my heart, “Change is inevitable; growth is optional.” You see, everything changes!! It may not be a good change…but it changes. It’s the way of the world. Change happens every day, every hour, every minute. You have to choose to grow! You choose spiritual, mental, and emotional growth. There comes a time when your mother no longer feeds you and you become accountable for your own nourishment. 

Years ago, I asked a Lamaze coach what happens to a baby who stays in the womb too long. Know what she said? It decomposes.  That’s also the way of the world. When something quits growing, it begins to decompose. That’s change! Even weeds that aren’t fed begin to wither. 

We have a choice. Will we grow in Christ? Or will we neglect the most important growth process there is? You feed yourself spiritually by reading your Bible and opening your spirit to the Spirit of God and talking with Him. True growth doesn’t happen just by listening to preachers—although that’s helpful.  It’s opening your Bible and asking the Spirit to teach you. He will!

You’re either growing or decomposing.  There’s no middle ground. Jesus is the Bread of Life! Feast on Him and you’ll grow!

What do I Get?

“What do I GET?” Isn’t that the question we begin asking at a very young age? We do something to please others—or win a game—and we want a prize! My sister and her five-year-old grandson, Truett, were here this past weekend.  He’d gotten a new indoor golf set and couldn’t wait to show me how good he was at getting a hole-in-one! As he was lining up his shot, he told me, “I get to wash dishes!!” He’d won an earlier game…and the prize his grandmother gave him was getting to wash dishes after dinner!  (Don’t laugh too hard—washing dishes is one of his favorite things to do!)

God tells us in Matthew 6 not to do things just to get a reward. Oh! There will be a reward if done in the right way—but it will come from the Father and not from men. Don’t pray just to get man’s attention. Don’t give and blare a horn so everyone notices. Don’t fast and look haggard just so men think you are pious. The only reward you receive when you do things to get noticed by men is the notice of men. There’s no reward from God. But when we focus on the kingdom of God and do these things to please Him, HE will reward us! It may not be an immediate reward—it may not even be given until we are in heaven. But we are to serve to please God and God alone. 

Mom and dad came to pick Truett up yesterday. After hearing about his hole-in-one and the prize of washing dishes, his dad told him if he could get another hole-in-one, he could mop the floor when he got home! My guess is Truett will eventually learn not to trust the reward of men. 

 

Who was Joseph?

If I were to ask you, “Who was Joseph in Matthew 1 & 2?” What would you say? How would you describe him?

•Would you say he was engaged to Mary?

•Would you say he was a descendant of David?

•What about a disappointed fiancè?

•How about a just or righteous man?

He was all of those things. He came from a pedigreed line of ancestors—sinners, all of them. But it was the Who’s Who of Israel!

What makes Joseph stand out? Righteousness and obedience. This righteous and just man didn’t want to humiliate Mary when he found out she was pregnant—so he was going to dissolve their engagement quietly. Until…an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream and explained Mary was pregnant with God’s Son and he shouldn’t be afraid to marry her. In fact, he was told to name the baby Jesus—for He would save His people from their sin. Remember that long line of pedigreed ancestors? They needed saving! But so did he and Mary. So do we. 

What did Joseph do? He obeyed instantly. He took Mary as his wife—but he didn’t have sex with her until after Jesus was born. I’m sure God instructed him to abstain from sex so there would be no question of whose Son this was! But then again…maybe Joseph just had that kind of integrity to guard what was God’s. Did you know sex was a huge stumbling block among his ancestors? Maybe Joseph purposed in his heart to be different; he chose to honor God. 

If I were to ask a group of those who know us best, who would they say we are? Have we overcome a familiar family sin? Are we humble and selfless?  Obedient? Righteous? Wise?

Mary & Joseph weren’t perfect. But their heart was after God. And when He asked them to be a part of His story? They said, “YES!” He’s asking us the same question, “Will you be a part of My story?”

What would you say?

Miraculous Details

I was reading Matthew 1-2 this morning, and I decided to write down every miraculous detail that happened in Jesus’ life as a baby. Here they are:

1. Mary, a virgin became pregnant with Jesus, God’s Son. 

2. An angel of the Lord told Joseph not to be afraid to marry Mary—she was pregnant with God’s Son and his name was to be Jesus. 

3. Wise Men followed a star to Bethlehem. 

4. Jesus fulfilled the prophecies of Bethlehem, Egypt, & Nazareth. 

5. The star led the Wise Men to Jesus. 

6. Gifts of provision were given to Jesus. 

7. Wise Men were warned in a dream not to go to Herod. 

8. Joseph was warned in a dream to go to Egypt. 

9. Jesus’ life was spared in the destruction of male babies. 

10. Joseph told in a dream to go to Israel because Herod had died. 

11. Joseph was warned in a dream to go to Galilee. 

God orchestrated Jesus’ life with great detail. He was God’s Son, after all! But so are you—if you’ve chosen to be adopted by God. He’s orchestrating your life with the same kind of miraculous detail—even if you’re not aware of it! Do you think it’s an accident that you live where you do? That you have THIS job? Are going to THIS school? Are married to THIS person? God’s been orchestrating details for your favor since you were born. YES!! We all live in the miraculous. He knows how to work with every choice you make—and turn it for your good. Be still today and look for the miraculous. Write down what you see. I think you’ll be amazed!